You may have noticed that I talk about the importance of rest and recovery for our community a lot. For some of us, this topic is a challenge. For a variety of reasons, we tend to resist the idea of slowing down and taking a break. Sometimes, it’s because we feel guilty about doing something as “indulgent” as stepping away from work and taking time for ourselves. Other times it’s because we are afraid that if we ever say “no” to a request, we will make people mad or perhaps they will never reach out and ask again. We may have in our head that we never saw mentors or others that we respect slow down, so why in the world should we? There are a variety of reasons to resist self-care. I’ve heard most of them and used several of them myself at one point or another in my career. I want to offer a few thoughts in response.
First, taking care of ourselves isn’t indulgent. This is about preparing us for ministry and serving our community. There is no way that we can fill other people up with encouragement and support if our own tank is empty. It just doesn’t work. God has placed us in roles in our communities because our people need us at our best. I would argue that it is poor stewardship and an unrealistic response to our callings if we have the foot on the gas pedal all the time without any expectation of stopping to refuel. As productivity master David Allen is fond of saying, “There’s always something around the corner. Are you going to be ready to respond?” Taking care of yourself so you can be ready to respond to the needs of your students or your community is no more indulgent than refueling and periodically changing the oil in your car. I don’t see people resisting that; it just makes sense and is responsible.
Second, it’s mandated by Jesus. Time and time again in scripture, we see Jesus pulling away from the crowds to go to a “lonely place” for prayer and reflection. The rest we get from periodic moments of “unplugging” are critically important in sustaining us for our work. Jesus, as the ultimate teacher, is modeling self-care for us. He’s the Son of God and he needs quiet time for rest and recovery. Why would we think that we could go without it?
Third, a comment needs to be offered about the idea of being “indispensable.” Every single one of us makes important contributions to the community on a daily basis. I don’t want to minimize that fact. However, if the program will collapse with our absence for a day or two, then we need to explore why things are so unstable or unsustainable in the first place. Claiming “indispensability” as a barrier to self-care can be prideful and should not be allowed in a community where health and wellbeing are valued. The contribution we need to make is the primary reason for self care, not an excuse to avoid it.
Now is the time for all of us to actively recognize and advocate for the value of rest and recovery in our school lives. I would argue this to be an essential part of any initiative—be it launching a new program, developing a plan to respond to injustice, or simply dealing with the day-to-day challenges of school ministry. Regardless, well-planned rest and recovery is mandatory.
The Rev. David A. Madison, D.Min., is Executive Director of NAES.