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The Practice of Intentional Pausing: A Reflection on Community in Episcopal Schools
A fellow teacher at the first Episcopal School where I taught gave me a piece of profound advice. It was centered on intentional pausing and has helped me consistently delight in the three Episcopal school communities I have been blessed to join.
A few weeks before my wedding in June 2006, my colleague said, “The day will go by very quickly. Pick a time each hour to pause and enjoy the sights and sounds around you. You will love what you see.”
That simple act helped me capture precious memories that would have otherwise been lost in the whirlwind of that joyful day. Friends reunited, family members bonded, and new friendships were formed. Among my favorite memories was catching a glimpse of my great aunt Rosalee engaged in animated conversation with my then-six-year-old student Henry. (Yes, I invited my Kindergarten students to my wedding!) Although I will never know what they were chatting about, I remember Aunt Rosalee and Henry laughing together like old friends.
These moments of joyful connection reflect the ethos we strive to cultivate in Episcopal schools, which are characterized by intentional, unmistakable expressions of community.
Initial professional pausing has allowed me to see teachers encouraging teachers, parents helping parents, administrators delighting in each other’s ideas, young students proudly acquainting grandparents with their school, students cheering each other on, parents of alumni happily reminiscing, and returning alumni walking eagerly toward the classroom of a beloved teacher.
Earlier this week, my school held its first-ever late-July community popsicle party. There were no PowerPoint presentations, podiums, microphones, or speeches. The setup was simple: an open playground, an ice-cream truck, a few bubble machines, a small speaker blasting summer tunes, a box of oversized chalk, oversized Connect Four and Jenga games spread across the grassy hillside, and a table with nametags.
Despite the threat of a late afternoon thunderstorm, dozens of families gathered to fellowship together. Pausing to soak in the sights and sounds, I saw students reuniting, parents bonding, and new friendships forming. Three middle schoolers (among the first to arrive) delighted in a return to the lower school campus they hold dear. Two fourth graders (one new to St. Patrick’s) giggled over their fascination with my dog Bailey. A three-year-old offered a timid, then vigorous, wave to another preschooler while a second grader raced over to hug a former teacher. Two siblings spontaneously wrote “Go Wolfhounds!” in chalk on the asphalt while administrators exchanged satisfied glances. Parents (well acquainted and newly acquainted) laughed together in the manner of Aunt Rosalee and Henry. I cherished what I saw.
The St. Patrick’s community has heard me say that our school is at its strongest when we gather together. As the academic year unfolds, I encourage each of you to begin the year by noticing and appreciating how your community makes its members feel seen, noticed, nurtured, and known. Administrators and parent leaders, rejoice in your essential planning. Teachers and coaches, delight in the atmosphere you foster so your students may thrive and experience belonging. Chaplains, continue to foster dialogue between faith traditions.
Celebrate Episcopal schools as spaces to honor each other’s infinite value and amplify God’s love. Stand in your own faith or beliefs, and be open to all. Pause and delight in all you see.
And remember, it will go quickly—just like a popsicle on a late summer day.
Jalene Spain Thomas is Head of School at St. Patrick’s Episcopal Day School in Washington, DC. She is the Board Vice-Chair of the Mid-Atlantic Episcopal Schools Association and Co-Chair of the Advisory Board of the Bishop John T. Walker School for Boys. Jalene Spain Thomas is Head of School at St. Patrick’s Episcopal Day School in Washington, DC. Jalene dedicates this post in memory of Sandi Hannibal: friend, mentor, and tireless advocate for children and Episcopal schools.