Although young children may not be able to express their ideas and questions about God in the same ways as adults or older children, they are spiritual beings. Episcopal early childhood and elementary programs can nurture the spiritual lives of children first by recognizing that young children are spiritual beings and then by giving their spiritual development the same attention and care as language development, motor skills, or social-emotional growth. How might we do this?
Learning about the spiritual development of children.
Most early childhood educators and even a fair number of clergy may not know a great deal about the spiritual worlds of young children or about how human beings make spiritual meaning as they develop from infants to adults. Parents and teachers may not feel comfortable talking with young children about God or know how to answer the very serious questions children can pose about life and death – and so say nothing or talk “around” the children’s concerns. Other adults may find talking about religion as just too difficult, especially when people have different beliefs and viewpoints.
But, as Dr. Dyer notes, “young children have an innate sense of spirituality that is all their own.” By understanding how young children experience the sacred and divine, those of us who work with young children in Episcopal schools can be better equipped to accompany our students as they take their first steps in a lifelong journey of spiritual discovery.
Observing the spiritual lives of children.
Teachers learn about young children through close observation and attentive listening: whether she is interested in dinosaurs or whales, whether he is angry or anxious, or how he approaches tough task. The same is true of their spiritual lives.
Dr. Dyer notes, “The key question is: what can we learn from the children we teach about their relationship with God? Our job is learning to know what they know. Spirituality in the classroom is not so much about adding new things but about connecting what we are already doing to God the Creator, a loving God. We need to follow the child, to listen to what he or she has to say and to the questions they ask.”
Teachers can be intentional about noticing and celebrating students’ sense of wonder and awe, their creativity, and how they care for others and the world around them. They can listen to their students’ questions about that which is unknowable and attend to their concerns. Rather than have all of the answers, caring teachers can engage students in how they are seeing and experiencing the hand of God in the world.
Creating an environment that honors the spirit.
The classroom and family are among the first places that young children begin to decode the rules and ways of life. In Episcopal schools, the routines, organization, and pace of the classroom can also create ample space for the spirit. Quiet places for stillness and reflection, opportunities to connect to the natural world, music, and stories as well as objects in the classroom should invite children to ponder, wonder, and explore the life of the spirit.
In addition, children quickly learn what is “out of bounds” for discussion. But young children, like all human beings, need safe opportunities to express themselves about life and death, the meaning of things, and their deepest questions and concerns, from the monster under the bed to what happens when someone dies. They also need lots of opportunities to express love, joy, beauty, awe, and wonder. Artistic expression, imaginative play, storytelling, and conversations with loving adults who listen carefully to children’s questions and concerns of the spirit are some of the ways that Episcopal schools can intentionally nurture the spiritual lives of their youngest students.
Nurturing relationships.
Learning to live in relationship with others is a central part of any quality early childhood program. It is also an important way to nurture children’s spiritual lives. The school and classroom cultures, including how teachers, parents, and students interact, send powerful messages about how we are to care for one another and for creation. Blessings, prayer, giving thanks, coming together in chapel, and helping others are all ways that children connect to God and to one another. Loving children for who they are (regardless of what they may sometimes do!) and honoring the unique spirit of each child communicates that they, like all of us, are children of a loving Creator who, as Desmond Tutu has so powerfully said, “are born to goodness.”
Honoring play.
When early childhood educators say “play is the work of childhood,” they mean child-centered opportunities for students to ask questions and test ideas, and to explore, create, discover, and learn-by-doing. Godly Play and Catechesis of the Good Shepherd are two examples of programs that are intentionally attuned to young children’s “ways of knowing.” Through stories, imaginative play, and hands-on materials, children can explore the great sacred stories of the Bible and other faiths as well as share their own beliefs and questions in safe and meaningful ways.
Worshipping with young children.
Gathering regularly for chapel and worship is a defining feature of Episcopal schools, including elementary and preschools. Worship with and for children, however, differs significantly from worship with and for adults. As stated in the NAES Principles of Good Practice for Chapel and Worship in Episcopal Schools, “Episcopal school worship is closely attuned to the social, emotional, spiritual, and intellectual needs of the students in attendance …It is the responsibility of chaplains and others in charge of school worship to develop the skills and knowledge necessary to create and lead age-appropriate chapel programs.”
The Four “R’s.”
The following four “R’s” can help to guide chapel planning for young children:
Ritual
As every parent knows, young children love predictability. So, too, school chapel should be consistent in form and structure, including how students enter, where and how they sit, how they participate, and how they depart.
Repetitive
Young children find comfort in repetition; open and close worship with the same song, sentence, or ritual. Children take great joy from mastering and repeating a manageable repertoire of songs or prayers, especially when accompanied by gestures. One new song per month or season is plenty of variety. If something new is to be introduced, take time to discuss it with and prepare the children in advance.
Respectful
We respect children when we tailor worship to their developmental needs. It’s important that students understand what they are singing or saying! Words and lyrics should be accessible and easy to understand, and themes or stories should relate to students’ lives. The age of the children should drive the length of chapel as well as the best time in the school schedule. Chapel leaders need to devote sufficient time to plan chapel. It’s important to work with classroom teachers so that chapel unfolds smoothly and predictably. Teachers can also offer suggestions about how to best tailor chapel talks or stories to a given age level and/or assist with chapel itself.
Relational
Young children yearn to connect. Chapel is a time to come closer to God and to one another. Skilled chapel leaders use greetings, blessings, and responsive prayers; ask or elicit questions; and use object lessons and compelling stories to connect to and engage students.
“We honor children not because they are tomorrow’s leaders but because they are today’s children,” notes Dr. Dyer. Episcopal early childhood programs and elementary schools have an extraordinary opportunity to nurture the spiritual lives of young children of all backgrounds and faiths. This has long been a hallmark of Episcopal education and one that remains as relevant and important as ever.
Dr. Amelia J. Gearey Dyer is the James Maxwell Professor of Christian Education and Pastoral Theology, and Director of the Ministry Resident Program at Virginia Theological Seminary. Dr. Dyer is a certified Godly Play teacher and serves as a Christian Education consultant to dioceses and parishes. She is a member of the National Association of Episcopal Christian Education Directors and the Religious Education Association.